{"id":2897,"date":"2018-06-25T12:34:06","date_gmt":"2018-06-25T12:34:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/fulbridge.org\/w\/?p=2897"},"modified":"2019-04-22T21:16:51","modified_gmt":"2019-04-22T21:16:51","slug":"seeing-and-silence","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fulbridge.org\/w\/seeing-and-silence\/","title":{"rendered":"Seeing and Silence"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u2013 by\u00a0Samantha Steiner<\/strong> \u2013<\/p>\n

Inspired by the famous TED Talk<\/a> <\/strong>by novelist Chimamanda Adichie, this summer, Fulbright ETAs share their experiences challenging or affirming the Single Story of the USA. Read the full series here.<\/a><\/strong><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

\n

The talk show panel fired off questions in Spanish ranging in topic from my take on U.S. politics to the details of my love life. We were on live television. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0I was six months into my grant period in Paran\u00e1 (\u201cpahr-uh-NAH\u201d), a small city an hour north of Buenos Aires by plane. \u00a0When word got around there was a <\/span>Yanqui<\/span><\/i> in town, the interview requests rolled in.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Sitting on the other side of the camera was Frederick*, who had moved to Paran\u00e1 from Texas just two weeks before. \u00a0The hosts\u2019 eyes lingered on him. They had likely never seen a Black person in their studio before.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Earlier that day, I had asked Frederick whether he wanted to join me on camera. I thought his Spanish was impeccable, but he wasn\u2019t so sure. \u00a0It didn\u2019t help that he was a self-identified introvert.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u201cThat\u2019s okay,\u201d he said. \u00a0\u201cI\u2019ll just watch.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u201cAre you sure? \u00a0You could just wave hello for a second.\u201d \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u201cI mean, sure. \u00a0I can just wave. \u00a0That\u2019s fine.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0I got fifteen minutes of airtime and Frederick, by choice, got fifteen seconds.<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

***<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0In my first week as a teaching assistant at the state university, my mentor introduced me to Patricia, the director of the English program. \u00a0Patricia offered her hand, a thoughtful gesture toward someone uninitiated into South America\u2019s usual greeting by hug.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u201cNice to meet you,\u201d she said. \u00a0\u201cYou don\u2019t look American. I thought you were from here.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u201cOh,\u201d I said, not sure what exactly she meant.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>***<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u201cYou were very nice to Patricia,\u201d my mentor later told me.\u00a0\u00a0\u201cShe was being very rude.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0In movies, he said, people from the U.S. are Caucasians with blond hair, blue eyes and lanky frames. This was an idea promoted not only by Argentine filmmakers, but also by Hollywood moguls who had found a market in South America. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0It was also an idea that had very little to do with my life in New York, where sixty percent of my high school graduating class was Asian by heritage. \u00a0Blond hair, blue eyes, and lanky frames were the exception, not the rule.\u00a0\u00a0My friends and I joked that just by being Caucasian, I was the odd one out.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0The director of the English program must have been surprised at the new teaching assistant, a five-foot-two anomaly with black hair and eyes the color of soil. I wondered how she would react if she ever met Frederick.<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

***<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0\u201cI wanna be where the people are,\u201d Mart\u00edn sang operatically, walking to the front of the classroom and offering me one hand. It was Thanksgiving in the U.S., but in Argentina, it was just another day. \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0I reached out and let him pull me to my feet. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u201cI wanna see, wanna see them dancing,\u201d I sang. \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0As the rest of the class trickled in, they were treated to an amateur Disney ballet. \u00a0We crooned together and he spun me around. Mart\u00edn was only a few years younger than myself. \u00a0When he, his boyfriend, and I got together outside of the classroom, silliness was our M.O.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Once my mentor arrived and everyone had taken their seats, class began. \u00a0The course was called U.S. Culture and Civilization. I thought I\u2019d speak to the theme, and to the day, by turning the conversation to an uncomfortable topic: the atrocities the U.S. committed against Native Americans. \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0A strong argument could be made, I told the class, that Disney\u2019s <\/span>Pocahontas<\/span><\/i> added insult to injury. The animated protagonist has a stereotypically Caucasian face and body type. \u00a0Her identity as Native American is defined by her skin tone and her wardrobe. Illustrators shoved her into what Kevin Gover, director of the National Museum of the American Indian, calls \u201ca buckskin cocktail dress.\u201d \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0My students looked a little confused. \u00a0Then Mart\u00edn said, <\/span>“That\u2019s fine, but for me, Pocahontas is not a princess.”<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0“Why not?” I asked.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0“Because she’s black,” he said with a giggle. \u00a0“I’m just joking.” His tone spelled Black the only way he had ever read it, with a lowercase b.\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0If a joke needs to be labeled to be understood, it’s not much of a joke.<\/span><\/p>\n

***<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0In accordance with U.S. and European fashion, Buenos Aires, Rosario, and C\u00f3rdoba operate on a nine to five schedule.\u00a0 The rest of Argentina upholds the siesta as unwritten law.\u00a0 From noon until four thirty, I was free to read, spend time with friends, and do whatever I pleased as long as I stayed indoors or somewhere with a strong police presence. \u00a0Muggers and pickpockets swarmed during siesta hours. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Frederick and I decided to get lunch in the main plaza, where officers were stationed at two block intervals. \u00a0<\/span>Yanquis<\/span><\/i> that we were, we forgot that most restaurants were closed.\u00a0 We settled on a caf\u00e9 where our only company was a bored-looking waiter who offered that we could sit wherever we liked. Frederick pointed to a table near the window, which offered a view of the fountain in the center of the plaza. We ordered and then sat back and relished the view.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0A man wandered in and sat at the table next to ours. \u00a0The rest of the restaurant was still empty. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u201cI can feel his eyes on us,\u201d I told Frederick. \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u201cYeah, it\u2019s weird,\u201d he agreed.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0I asked if he wanted to move to a different table, or if I should say something.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u201cI don\u2019t want to make a big deal of it. \u00a0Let\u2019s just ignore it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Our food arrived and the man was distracted by the arrival of a friend in a salmon-colored shirt. Then I looked up to see Frederick raising a French fry to his mouth, and behind him, the man in the salmon-colored shirt standing by the window and taking a selfie. \u00a0The man held his phone as if he were trying to capture the plaza outside, but I saw him swivel his arm so that the fountain was replaced with the back of Frederick\u2019s head.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u201c<\/span>\u00bf<\/span>Qu\u00e9 est\u00e1s haciendo?\u201d I demanded in Spanish. \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0He responded reflexively that he had the right to take photos wherever he wanted. He must have been curious, and embarrassed.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>Frederick looked more than uncomfortable as the man returned to his seat, grumbling. \u00a0The waiter did nothing.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0I suggested again that we move to another table. \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0No, Frederick said. \u00a0He preferred to ignore it. \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

***<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Before Frederick arrived in Argentina, I felt powerless when it came to conversations on race. \u00a0Whenever I encountered an individual with a troubling attitude, all I could do was share my perspective and amend it with the caveat that I could not possibly understand the lived experiences of people of color.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0When Frederick came, I was excited to see him set the record straight. \u00a0Gradually, I realized I had placed on him the same burden that many Argentines had: I had made him into a single story. \u00a0His behavior and opinions somehow had to represent those of all Blacks from the U.S. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Frederick hadn\u2019t asked for this burden, and he wasn\u2019t about to sacrifice his time playing mascot for U.S. race relations. \u00a0Some vital lessons were never taught, but one was: I recognized my own role in fueling a dangerous dynamic. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0I was still glowering at the man in the salmon-colored shirt when one of my students, an Argentine, joined our table. Frederick looked relieved. \u00a0Then I realized what he already knew. The goal of our time in this country was not to change hostile minds, but to get to know new friends. The three of us finished our lunch, wandered into the sunshine, and took a selfie by the fountain. \u00a0This time, Frederick held the camera.<\/span><\/p>\n

*Name changed for anonymity.<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

This piece was written by Samantha Steiner.\u00a0\u00a0She served as a 2017 ETA in Entre R\u00edos, Argentina.\u00a0 Her writings and illustrations have been featured inThe International Writers’ Blog<\/i>,\u00a0Pipe Dream,\u00a0<\/i>and the 2017 book\u00a0The Knowledge Illusion: Why We Never Think Alone<\/i>.\u00a0 This fall, she will begin an\u00a0MFA in creative nonfiction writing\u00a0at Sarah Lawrence College.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u2013 by\u00a0Samantha Steiner \u2013 Inspired by the famous TED Talk by novelist Chimamanda Adichie, this summer, Fulbright ETAs share their experiences challenging or affirming the Single Story of the USA. Read the full series here. The talk show panel fired off questions in Spanish ranging in topic from my take… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":18,"featured_media":2904,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"spay_email":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[317],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/fulbridge.org\/w\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/06\/IMG-20171024-WA0022.jpg?fit=1280%2C960&ssl=1","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/fulbridge.org\/w\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2897"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/fulbridge.org\/w\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/fulbridge.org\/w\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fulbridge.org\/w\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/18"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fulbridge.org\/w\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2897"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/fulbridge.org\/w\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2897\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2913,"href":"https:\/\/fulbridge.org\/w\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2897\/revisions\/2913"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fulbridge.org\/w\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2904"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/fulbridge.org\/w\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2897"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fulbridge.org\/w\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2897"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fulbridge.org\/w\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2897"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}